A Human's Love
by 221BSexySt
Summary: It has been approximately 3 months after the angel's have fallen. Castiel is trying his best to be human, but he has many questions. One in particular is bugging the new human. What is romantic love? And Dean's not sure how to explain it. Human!Cas and Jealous!Dean set after season 8 (prompt from casflavoredpie on tumblr)
1. Chapter 1

Casflavoredpie on tumblr suggested as a prompt: I would love if you wrote about Castiel asking Dean what romantic love feels like, then Dean realizing he feels that way about Cas.

And I wanted to write a jealous!dean scenario and I wanted human!cas.

So yeah…Hope you enjoy.

* * *

It had been 3 or so months after the angels had fallen from grace. 3 months of Castiel trying with all his might to be completely submerged in being human. 3 months filled with stress and struggles for the ex-angel and hunters. Dean and Sam sat at the table in the men of letters bunker (also known as the Bat Cave) and read through a billion different books, trying to figure out some way to get the angels back up to heaven. Sam had survived the mostly completed trials to close hell, not without some odd side effects, but still… He wasn't dead or dying so Dean counted that as a win.

And despite the difficult change into being human, Cas was dealing with his loss of grace fairly well. As best as one can expect from him, at least. Dean admired Cas' bravery and he had been so happy that Cas hadn't fallen like Anna did and was an infant with no memory of them, that he couldn't really stay mad at Cas for not coming as soon as he called when the angels began to fall. Because he knew now that it had been impossible for Cas to do that at the time, with no angelic powers and all.

So they all could be doing much worse at the moment, but still it had been a very stressful few months and Dean needed to get out.

"Sammy, I don't see a single thing in any of these books that says a lick about how to get the angels topside again." Dean said tossing a book onto the table and picking up his cold cup of coffee. Castiel entered then with two more steaming hot cups in his hand for the brothers. Castiel had recently been trying to make food for the past week, as part of his "human training". It was going surprisingly well, except for the incident with the burnt pancakes. Dean was still, even after 3 months of Cas being human, trying to get use to the more human things that Castiel did. For example, instead of being completely stoic and stiff when standing beside Dean now, he was a bit hunched over and much more relaxed. He showed in his body language that he was tired but refused to outwardly tell anyone about it.

"Well I don't know Dean. I guess we just have to keep looking. What else can we do?" Sam said as he picked up the cup that Cas laid down for him and took a sip. Cas sat next to Dean and looked at the books open in front of him placing his hands over the page and leaning in to look at the script.

"Cas, when was the last time you slept?" Dean asked.

"Surprisingly I have slept much more, as of recent. But it is still difficult to get used to it, I admit." Castiel replied carefully. Honestly he didn't like sleeping at all. He felt much too vulnerable. He didn't like being unconscious, even if it was for only a few hours. It was something he much rather missed about being an angel, the lack of need for sleep. Dean let out a gruff sigh and leaned back in his chair tipping it onto 2 legs instead of 4 while he stretched his arms and legs out.

"We need a break." Dean said.

"Okay, uh…you wanna watch some TV?" Sam asked setting his cup down.

"No, I mean we need to get out of here. I love the bat cave as much as the next guy, but we need to blow off some steam." Dean said. Cas glanced up from the book to look at Dean who was setting his chair back on all fours now. Cas gave him his customary confused head tilt and Dean let a small grin creep onto his face. He couldn't help it really, he knew Cas was human now, but sometimes Cas' old naive angelic self would slip out and Dean couldn't help but give him a sad smile.

"Blow off some steam Cas, it's like, having some fun, letting your brain relax for a bit. Taking a few to just chill…We need to go to a bar." Dean resolved in the end of his explanation to Cas.

"A bar? Really?" Sam asked as he ran his hand through his floppy brown hair.

"Why not? We've been working our asses off trying to figure out this angel/Metatron thing, we deserve some time to just…_relax_." Dean said to his brother. Cas frowned to himself.

"I guess you're right." Sam said slowly.

"I know I'm right. Okay, it's settled we get changed and we head out to a bar. Meet at baby in 10 minutes. " Dean said. Sam nodded and stood up, stretching his arms above his head. Dean stood up too, drinking the last of his coffee that Cas had brought him. He hadn't even realized he had been drinking it while they were talking…

Castiel didn't move to stand up. Sam left the room and Dean started to walk out but paused when he noticed Cas not getting up.

"Come on Cas, get a move on, you can't wear that to a bar. The chicks'll think you're fresh out of the loony bin." Dean said, indicating the grey t-shirt he had borrowed from Dean and black sweat pants.

"I will not be accompanying you." Castiel replied quietly, not looking Dean in the eyes, which made Dean feel uncomfortable.

"What the hell you talking about man? You need to blow off some steam, too. You've been working hard trying to be human." Dean said.

"And I wouldn't have to work to be human if I hadn't let Metatron trick me in the first place." Castiel replied with a cold tone. Dean sighed.

"Cas, we've talked about this. It wasn't your fault. It was Metatron's and we're gonna find the bastard and a way to get the angel's back upstairs." Dean said quietly. There was a moment of silence and then Dean cleared his throat.

"Besides," Dean began with a chuckle.

"I need a wing man tonight, and since you've had wings I thought you'd be perfect for the job." Dean grinned at Cas who looked up at him, a small smile crossing his cracked lips. Dean glanced down at them, but only for a moment before he met Cas' eyes again.

"Come on, maybe going out tonight will help get your mind off of things." Dean urged. Cas nodded slowly in agreement and started to stand.

"That's what I'm talkin' 'bout." Dean smiled and left the room to go change. Cas sighed. He felt a bit better, though he almost always did after Dean talked with him. Although, Castiel was still feeling a bit apprehensive about going out into the "real world". He had, after all, just become human not only 3 months prior. He hoped that he could interact correctly with other humans without being too much of a nuisance on Dean.


	2. Chapter 2

The bar was in full swing when team free will stepped through its doors. The three men quickly found a booth and decided to get some food with their beer. Dean ordered a light beer for Cas hoping that he could handle it. They all knew that it took quite a lot of hard liquor to get Angel Cas drunk. But now that he was human, none of them were sure how much Castiel could consume without passing out. Dean hoped that he could at least finish his beer, otherwise that would just be sad.

"Okay, now don't just suck it all down in one sitting Cas. We aren't sure how you're gonna react to alcohol now that your 100% flesh and bones." Dean said as he set the beer in front of Cas.

"I know Dean." Cas said agitation edging his voice. Dean chuckled at that and picked up his own beer. Cas slowly began to nurse his beer as he nibbled at the French fries that they got to snack on. Dean watched Cas more carefully than he'd like to admit as the night proceeded, he just wanted to make sure that he was okay with the alcohol but also having a good time. At least that's what Dean told himself.

Sam had insisted that Castiel try karaoke, which was probably the best thing to happen on Earth in a long time, at least according to Dean. Cas had stood up on stage with a microphone in one hand and a half drank beer in the other. He squinted at the screen and read the words as the music played. Dean cracked up. Cas had no idea how the song was supposed to go and had no idea how to sing it, which made everything funnier as he spoke the words in time with the beat. Occasionally Cas would look over to Dean for help or approval in which Dean would take a deep breath and stop laughing long enough to give Castiel a thumbs up and a big grin. When Cas was done he came back to the booth with cheeks as red as fire trucks.

"That was quite unusual. I wish to never do it again, if at all possible." Cas said to Dean as the hunter patted Cas on the back in congratulations. Dean let his hand linger on Cas' back a few moments more than necessary before removing his hand and digging into the fries before him. Castiel didn't say anything, but he silently wished that Dean had left his hand on him, if not for just a few moments longer. Dean's touch somehow comforted Cas very much and made him forget about his embarrassment. Sam was still chuckling as he looked around the bar.

"Well Cas, I think the ladies liked it." He said as he took a drink.

"What?" Cas and Dean said in an unintentional unison. Sam glanced between the two, caught off guard for a second.

"Uh, well I was just noticing all the girls in here are now staring at Cas like he's some kind of consolation prize." Sam said as he motioned around the bar with his glass. As Dean and Cas turned around in their seats, Sam's observation proved correct as most of the young ladies in the establishment were now staring at their booth like it was made of gold or something.

"Huh, would you look at that." Dean said under his breath. Castiel leaned forward next to Dean's ear.

"I don't understand what this means." He said quietly.

"It means, that this is could be your sequel to the brothel." Sam smiled. Dean shot a glare at him, which he wasn't trying to do, it just kind of happened.

"I thought you were against Cas getting with girls and committing sins and… stuff." Dean snapped.

"Well yeah, I was when he was an angel. But he's human now Dean. He doesn't have to worry about all that now. He can do what he wants. " Sam replied biting into a french fry.

"Cas you don't have to do anything. Sasquatch over here is just trying to live vicariously through you or some shit." Dean said but Cas turned to look at Dean with intrigued eyes.

"Somehow I'm not as scared this time. Maybe it's part of becoming human, but I am rather excited. I would like to talk to one of these young ladies." Cas said with the smallest of smiles sneaking onto his features. Cas thought that it would make Dean happy if he could try and be happy. That way Dean wouldn't worry so much about it. And Dean always seemed fairly happy when surrounded by beautiful women, so that must be a part of it.

"That's the spirit Cas! Come on, that red head at the bar was staring at you even _before_ you went on stage. Let's go say hi." Sam said as he gets up and tugs on Cas' trench coat. Despite becoming human, that was one article of clothing Cas rarely took off. It was almost like a security blanket of sorts.

Dean watches with hard eyes as Sam pulls Cas over to the bar and plops the man on a bar stool right next to a lovely red headed woman who blushed as she looked up into Cas' big, blue eyes. Dean frowned.

"Of course you're gonna blush when you stare at those things, they're like giant pools of water." Dean muttered to himself as he continued to watch them. He couldn't really hear what they were saying, but he sort of good at reading lips and figured Sam was really laying it on thick.

"Hey there. I'm Sam and this here is my friend Cas. He's from…out of town and he's a bit shy. He just wanted to come and say hello to you." Sam says as he stands off to the side, next to Cas.

"Oh, well hi. I'm Amelia." The woman stuck out her hand. Cas cautiously took it and shook gently.

"Hello." Castiel replied.

"So what brings you here Cas?" Said the woman.

"Dean says we're here blowing off steam." Cas replied.

"Dean?" She asks.

"Oh, he's my brother. Actually, I should get back over to him. Cas how about you stay here and chat with Amelia a bit." Sam said patted Cas on the back.

"Yes, of course Sam." Cas replied as he watched Sam leave. Cas felt a bit nervous talking to this woman, but he had to push on if he wanted to make Dean stop worrying about him and have a good time. Unknown to Castiel, this whole situation was actually causing more stress for Dean. More stress than he had felt even in the last few months, and he wasn't sure why. _Maybe Cas is over there and is completely bored out of his mind. OR what if she's a demon who was sent here to spy on Cas. OR- _Dean's thoughts just got more distressed and ludicrous from there on. As he sat with Sam he continuously kept glancing over at the bar to watch Cas and the woman that Sam said was named Amelia. Amelia was very beautiful, but Dean didn't let that fool him. He was convinced that she was no good for Cas, although he wouldn't tell Sam that.

"You jealous?" Sam chuckled as he started his 4th beer. Dean's head snapped to look at Sam, his eyes wide.

"What?" He choked out.

"You know, Cas getting all that attention from a hot girl. You're not jealous of him are you?" Sam teased. For some reason Dean sighed in what seemed to be, relief.

"Yeah, don't count on it." Dean chuckled, and he was serious. He really wasn't jealous of the red head named Amelia, she was good-looking but nothing special.

Two more rounds later and Dean started to feel a bit dizzy but he still kept a very close eye on Castiel and the red head, whose name has slipped his mind.

"Why is he still talkin' to her?" Dean grumbled, his words a bit garbled by the alcohol.

"Who? Cas? Leave him be, he seems to be really hitting it off with her. Hey, he might even get lucky tonight." Sam chuckled. Dean scowled at that thought.

"Dean seriously, he's fine. Just lighten up, okay?" Sam said as he stood up.

"I got to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back."

Dean barely noticed as Sam passed in front of his view of Cas and headed toward the men's room. _Why am I obsessing over this? Why can't I just let well enough alone? _Dean thought to himself suddenly. Dean slowly began to turn away to face the cute waitress with the nametag "Jenny" that had just came up when he saw it. He had almost completely looked away from Cas but then he saw the movement of that fiery red hair and his head snapped back to watch as Amelia leaned in toward as and kissed him gently on the mouth. Dean's jaw hit the floor and then kept going all the way to hell. _Poor Cas must be scared out of his mind, he must be freaking out, he must be…_

"Kissing her back?!" Dean growled out loud. His voice was loud and intimidating enough for Jenny, the cute waitress jumps back a few feet with wide eyes.

Sure enough Cas had brought his hands up to cup Amelia's face and he proceeded to kiss her back. After a moment, they parted and Cas smiled. That's when Dean kind of lost it. He stood up, without tearing his eyes from the couple at the bar, and slammed a wad of cash on the counter. Still staring at Cas and Amelia he spoke to the waitress who still bravely stood next to the fuming young man.

"Tell my brother that we went back to the batcave." He said through clenched teeth, and with that he stalked off toward Castiel at the bar.


	3. Chapter 3

Dean didn't say a word to Cas as they drove back to the bunker. The Impala was dead silent and Castiel was becoming more and more confused. When they got back Dean continued the silence inside as he swiftly made his way to his room and slammed the door. Dean was too drunk and too worked up to talk to anyone or do anything. Castiel was in a state of bewilderment, he thought that if he flirted and kissed girls like Dean did, then Dean would be proud. But instead, Dean seemed to be annoyed maybe even angry with him, and Cas had no idea why. _Being human is difficult. _Cas thought solemnly. He very much wished that Dean wasn't upset with him so he could say some encouraging words to comfort Castiel in this small moment of sadness and confusion.

The next morning Castiel sat at the table with an irritated Sam, who had to walk back to the bunker the previous night. Sam had a cup of coffee and some toast that was slightly burnt, courtesy of chef Cas, while Cas himself had some orange juice, some toast and some honey on the side. As they both tried to wake up a bit more Castiel began to talk to Sam about his encounter with Amelia.

"She's very nice and a very good listener." Cas began.

"You didn't tell her too much, right Cas?" Sam asked nonchalantly.

"Oh yes, of course. I kept my previous state of being, out of the conversation. I mostly just talked about Dean…" Cas said thoughtfully taking a bite out of his honey covered toast. Sam looked up with an odd expression.

"and you of course." Cas added quickly, hoping that he hadn't hurt the youngest Winchester's feelings. Sam did a little "humph" of amusement and continued to drink his coffee. Not long after they started talking about Amelia, Sam got the full extent of _how much_ Cas had talked about Dean. It was mainly the basis of Cas and Amelia's entire conversation. Sam found this somewhat amusing, poor Cas probably had no idea that he seemed fairly obsessive about Dean. From an outsiders prospective it must have seemed odd, but Cas then told Sam that she had kissed him and that Cas had reciprocated.

"Well good on you Cas." Sam grinned. Just then Dean stumbled into the room his head hung low.

"Oh look who's finally up. Good _afternoon_ Dean." Sam said loudly. Dean cringed.

"Thanks for leaving me at the bar last night, I left my smelly socks in your bed. Did you like waking up to them?" Sam asked smugly. Dean just huffed and turned back around.

"What you don't want any breakfast? Cas and I were just talking about how Amelia laid one on him." Sam teased.

"Sam, I don't think that Dean wants to hear about that." Cas said carefully. Dean scowled and started to walk out.

"Too hung over for food." Dean mumbled as he headed back down the hall to his room. Cas frowned. He had to think of a way to make Dean feel better. Maybe make Dean feel useful like when Dean makes him feel when he is feeling useless without his angelic powers.

That night after a long day of helping Sam look through the men of letter's books Cas decided he would ask Dean a question that had been bugging him since the bar. This way Cas would get an answer to this nagging question and Dean would feel useful for providing a sufficient answer.

There was a soft but confident knocking at Dean's door at around 11pm that night. Dean was laying on his bed reading one of the men of letter's books when he heard it. He sighed but still told whoever it was to come in, hoping it was Sam and not Cas. He didn't really want to sort out what he had felt at the bar, and seeing Cas wouldn't help that situation. Unfortunately for him, Cas was the one who entered his room. Castiel wore some brown sweat pants and a blue t-shirt underneath his trench coat. Dean didn't smile, but he stared at the coat with a certain fondness for it. Cas came in and sat at the edge of Dean's bed. It was silent for a few moments as Cas tried to think about how he would start, after another moment he began with,

"Dean. You know, that girl Amelia was very nice…She said she was a Christian and that she had many siblings like myself. Of course, she doesn't have as many as I do, but still…" Cas chuckled a little and looked to Dean who just kind of frowned at his bedspread. Dean refused to look at Cas, at least for right now. There was another long pause as Cas debated whether or not that was a good start to asking his question. Then without any real warning he just bluntly turned and asked Dean,

"Dean, what does romantic love feel like?"

Dean scowled.

"Trust me Cas, what you're feelin' aint love, okay?" Dean spat out bitterly. It came out a bit harsher than he intended. Dean had no idea _why _he was so annoyed with Cas. He just…

"Are you sure dean, because she was quite beautiful." Cas interjected in confusion.

"I just know Cas!" Dean bit out angrily. Cas took a deep breath.

"Alright. Then tell me what romantic love feels like so I can tell the difference." Cas reasoned with him calmly. Dean huffed and another long moment passed. Finally Dean spoke in a gruff tone.

"When it's romantic you want to be…intimate with the person. You know, you want to…" Dean tried to find the right words.

"Kiss them?" Cas asked. Dean glared at him.

"Yeah, but it's _more_ than just that. Wanting to kiss and have sex with someone is lust. Love is…different… You want to be with that person, and I don't just mean be with them sexually. You want to always be around them." Dean said looking at the peeling wallpaper of his room.

"Like you and Sam are?" Cas asked.

"No! Like… I dunno, it's like…okay let's start over." Dean states, now becoming more invested in teaching Cas what he meant. He chanced a glance up to Cas' confused face and instantly got caught in his blue eyes.

"Okay. Uh, how do I explain this…" Dean said in general as he cleared his throat glancing away from Cas' eyes. He scooted to the edge of his bed and put his feet on the ground to steady himself a bit more.

"Well, it's when you like someone who's not a part of your family…" Dean began making sure that Cas understood that point.

"So, a friend?" Cas ventured.

"Well yeah, normally you're friend's first..." Dean's gazed flicked up to look at Cas who now nodded in understanding to what Dean was explaining. Dean quickly looked away, licked his lips and ran his hands up and down his thighs for a moment or two as he collected his thoughts.

"I gather there is more to romantic love, for I don't think you can be in love with all of your friend's" Cas replied. Dean smirked.

"Yeah, there's more." Dean let out a tense chuckle and continued.

"You always want to be with that person no matter what. Whether you're killing vamps or just having dinner and eating some crappy pancakes." Dean glanced at Cas again and Cas gave him a stern look of 'Don't you dare bring up my cooking mishaps'. Dean smiled in spite himself, and proceeded.

"You kinda feel empty when they aren't around and when they are you always want to be near them." Dean paused a moment, when he started to explain this to Cas he had been trying to remember how he had felt about Lisa but a random thought popped into his head. He had always felt kind of…empty, when Cas was away. Like part of him is _with _Cas or something. And when Cas _was_ there, they _did _seem to gravitate toward each other… Dean shook his head to clear it and looked up at Cas who was watching him closely, silently waiting for Dean. Then hunter looked away, _you can't think about Cas like that, Jeesh! _But without really knowing it Dean began to ramble what came to mind when he thought of Cas.

"You think about them probably more than you should." Dean began quickly sneaking a quick glance up at Cas.

"I mean like, even when you're supposed to be hunting or focusing on research or with a girl in a bar you are _constantly _thinking about them. And it's not even conscious; they're just lingering in the back of your mind. And you think to yourself that it's just me worrying about a friend or that it's natural to be thinking about them while you're kissing on the girl you met on your last job. But then you start to have _other thoughts_, the kind of thoughts that you can't just explain away with friendship." Dean was full on rambling now and Castiel was a bit more than confused. He tilted his head and stared at Dean as he thought about what Dean was trying to say.

"Um, I'm a bit lost Dean." Cas said as Dean looked up at him. Dean's chest got tight as he saw Cas tilt his head and look at him with those big, blue, confused eyes. Dean involuntarily blushed. _What is __**wrong**_ _with me? _Dean thought bitterly. He was always so good at pushing this stuff down where even _he _couldn't find it. Dean didn't know what to say which was okay because Cas spoke next.

"So what kind of thoughts are these _other_ thoughts." Cas had done some nice air quotations over the word "other". Dean couldn't help but smile, he was getting better at that. But his face fell soon after…

"Well you know, like…this…"Before Dean realized what he was doing he was wrapping his hand around Castiel's neck and pulling his cracked lips closer to his own until finally they met. Cas' lips were surprisingly soft and they were warm, too. Dean felt like he could melt into those lips. And with a shocking realization he found the answer to Castiel's question. Love, is what he felt for Cas. He felt foolish for not realizing it before. All those years of staring at him, admiring him, wishing he wouldn't just disappear on him again. Dean smiled into Cas' lips. He knew he shouldn't be happy about it, but a part of him was happy that Cas didn't have his powers. Because that meant that Cas couldn't just pop out whenever he wanted. He didn't have to worry about Cas disappearing into thin air as he pulled Cas' face closer to his as he deepened the kiss. He was in love with Cas. He loved his bravery, his determination, his obvious love for the human race, even his odd fascination with bees. He loved everything about this man, and his heart ached a little bit. Because he wasn't sure how Castiel felt about him. But he pushed that aside for a moment, because if there was one thing he did know, it was that Cas' was very much enjoying this kiss.

Castiel moaned into Dean's lips as Dean slightly parted them and slid his tongue out to graze over Cas' chapped ones. Cas almost on instinct moved closer to Dean and leaned into him, parting his lips as well. For a moment the just breathed into each other, tasting each other, then Castiel reciprocated by letting his tongue explore Dean's warm inviting mouth as well. Dean's hands slid to Cas' hips and gripped his tightly pulling him as close to his body as humanly possible. Which was a bit odd as they were both sitting on the edge of the bed, so Dean eradicated the issue by pulling Castiel down to lay on the bed. They both broke for a moment to catch a breath and Dean pulled back so he could see those intense blue eyes staring back at him. He was not disappointed as Castiel stared at Dean as if he was the only thing in the world. But Dean stopped, that was just Cas' lust talking. Cas was only just talking about how he felt for that Amelia girl, that was lust, too. At least Dean hoped so.

Without warning Dean crawled onto Cas and straddled him he lowered his body onto Castiel's and kissed him gently on the neck right by the collar of the discolored blue shirt. Then he slowly worked his way up to Cas' lips, sending light, tingling kisses that sent chills down Castiel's spine. Castiel was positive now that he did not feel love for Amelia. That much was clear. He still wasn't positive what love felt like, but he desperately hoped that it was how he felt for Dean. As Dean slowly started to grind on Cas, the ex-angel had to pull away from their kiss. Dean looked confused and a little sad. He was preparing for Castiel to tell him that he loved this Amelia girl and that he didn't like Dean the same way. However, that is not what Cas said.

"Dean, before we go any further, I must know what love feels like. I have to know if that's what I have felt, if that is what I feel." Castiel says staring up at Dean. Dean's eyes fell to Cas' chest with sadness.

"About Amelia?" He asked somberly, trying to finish Cas' statement. Castiel's expression turned confused, then he smiled sadly. He let out a deep, low chuckle and pulled Dean's chin up to force him to look Cas in the face.

"No, you assbutt. About _**you**__._" He said as he raptured Dean in another kiss. After a moment Dean pulled back and smiled wider than he had in _years. _

"Love…" He began, flicking his gaze to Cas' lips again, this time not at all ashamed about it.

"Is what I feel for you." Dean finished as Cas grinned up at him.

"It has_** always**_ been you."

_Fin_


End file.
